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mystryman
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Name: Mystery
Location: Tampa Bay Area, Florida, United States
Birthday: 11/21/1982
Gender: Male
Interests: Riding unicycles, feeding chickens, cutting onions to show my emotional side, parking on the parkway and driving on the driveway, old ladies, and pee'ing while standing up.
Expertise: I can wrestle your mom for $5.
Occupation: Retired
Industry: Entertainment
Message: message meEmail: email me
AIM:  Sabith2000
Member Since:
9/4/2003
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| I can't afford gas! This is getting to be reeeediculous! In order for me to survive, i've decided to give up on a few things in life in order to pay for gas: *Hygenic products *underwear *socks *breakfast *Air Conditioning *Friends (can't afford them anymore!) That's what i've given up so far....i'm sure with the way the economy is going, i'm probably going to have to give up some more...BUUUTTT, there are a few things that I refuse to give up: *The Internet *Cable TV *basketball *Taco Bell *toilet paper This is really crazy. I wish I was 16 again. When i first got my liscense, gas price was $1.18!! ( source: http://www.eia.doe.gov/emeu/international/gas1.html). 10 years later and the national average is now over $4.00!!! Bush, what the hell did u do to us?!?! I wanna know...what have you done to change your daily habits in order to save money nowadays? I need tips...i drive 60 miles a day for work (30 & 30) and it's killing me! What else can i do, besides burning this car too and getting a moped (which isn't such a bad idea) Anywho, to all the pentis out there...are yall going to PCNAK??? Ehh, i dunno anymore about that....now that i'm 25 going on 26....all i'm getting now a days is "When are u getting married.....are u with someone.....did u find a girl....ve shall find u a good one!" I feel like that's all i'm gonna hear when i to confrence this year! Anyone else going through that now??? anywho, this was a lame entry...i just needed to write to pass time and get out my frustrations about gas....DAMN YOU BUSH!!!! (Go OBAMA!) Yours Unpolitically, Me | | |
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And like the rash on my butt that keeps coming back...I return! Just like I told ya I would!
Just
another quick update....you probably wondered how my lovely day went
yesterday...well i'll tell ya, it was superb! 2 hours sleeping at work,
then left early...then went home to sleep til the crack of 2pm...then
woke up, called mama (Mother's Day..ya know) and then headed off to a
pool party with mi amigos (and amigas). Great times, I was there til
11pm! Now i'm roasted like a duck! Anywho..that was a quickie
update...now on to the good stuff....like crack cocaine
Update
#2.....Sooo you'll probably laugh at this one, but don't...cuz i'll
kill you! I had to go to the hospital and get stitches on my beautiful
face!!!! GASP you say! What happened Mystry....are you ok!?!?! Yes, yes
beloved fans and adored haters...i'm ok...and only cuz the big man
upstairs was watching out. So this is the part where you'll probably
laugh..cuz if you laughed a lil bit ago, then you're a jerk. Well it
was a cold winter night in Florida (yes, we have cold weather too!) and
my parents being the typical indian parents they are....they have a
veggie garden in our extremely large backyard....and being that there
was a freeze alert in the area, my dear old mother woke me out of bed
to ask me if i could go cover the plants for her....and being the good
son that i am...i did! Unfortunately, our porch light doesn't reach all
the way back to our back of our yard and so she stood outside
diligently with a flashlight directing me. Now mind you, i'm outside in
nothing but boxers and i'm freezing...so i'm trying to hurry up this
little veggie-rescue excursion. As soon as i'm done, i high tail my
cold butt back into the house...or so i thought. As i was running, my
mother decides to turn around and take the flashlight with her...and as
soon as that happens...i run full speed...right into the fence
pole....splitting my forehead open...right between my eyes!!! I was
knocked out on my butt and when i got up..all i could feel was a warm
rushing of liquid flowing down my face...which at the time, i thought
was my dog peeing on me (which would've been any better). No, it was
blood...and worse, it was my own blood rushing down a inch wide gap
right in between my eyes. I stuck my finger in it to see how deep it
was...i think i felt bone. So i get up and walk to the house, still
dripping with blood and my mother freaks out. She tells me to rush
inside, but me...i'm too worried about staining the floor with my
blood...so i stay outdoors...until my father decides to beat me
inside....long story short...i was rushed to the emergency room and i
have 4 stitches on my forehead...Doctor told me I was a lucky guy...any
further right or left and one of my eyes could've been gone.....btw, he
wasn't one of those funny doctors like you see on Scrubs (btw, which i
love, and so dissappointed to see that its on its final season...boo
NBC). Anywho...so i had stitches on my face for about 5 days...and like
a true man that i am, instead of having the doctors remove my
stitches...i did it myself....To much disapproval of my mother.....and
a few months later, here i am, still alive, with both eyes and a newly
found love for having a battle scar..........chicks dig scars
Update
#3.... you would think i'm running into a string of bad luck with this
next update....i would think the same. I'm just gonna lay it down for
ya...no sugar coating it...or warming you up to this next update..but
here it goes.....BOOOM...my car exploded.......Kablooooey! Just like
the movies...well not JUST like the movies, i mean, it didn't flip over
and shards of metal and glass didn't come flying at my face..but damn
near close enough to the movies...it was kinda......well not
kinda...but it was freakin scary and kinda exciting at the same
time....but anywho, i'll tell ya how it goes:
So i'm
driving home one evening after class, i'd say 10ish, but whatever, it's
dark, not that many cars are on the interstate, so i'm enjoying a nice
open road...a lil erie, but eh, whatever. Anywho, the car starts
slowing down on its own, so i start stepping on the gas a lil bit more,
but the more i give it gas, the harder it is for it to speed up (1st
indication of iminent danger)...3 more minutes later of this struggle,
i heard a loud bang from from the engine of my car...and smoke...lots
and lots of smoke (2nd indication of iminent danger)...dirty smoke too,
not like like the nice puffs of white smoke that indians used to send
signals...nope, it was greyish and blackish...if i was sending a smoke
signal, it'd probably be "help, my car just caught on fire", but alas,
no Running Horse or Chief Hawkeye came to my rescue.....i
digress.....so my cars is shaking violently and puffs of smoke are
coming out of my car, but luckily for me, no cars are around me at all,
since i couldn't see in front of me, i had to pray for the best and
just pull over from the middle lane to the far left side of the road to
the median. As i got my car to a stop and stepped out, i notice a
glowing red light, not like christmas glowing red, but more like raging
fire kinda red, which it was (3rd and final indication of now present
danger....no longer iminent). Yup, it was fire..under the engine of my
car....droplets of liquid fire dropping from the bottom of the car on
to the grass catching that on fire...and stupid me...decides that
causing a forest fire is not what i want to be known for...so i push my
car back on my own...and try to fan out the grass fire (instead of the
fire raging in my car's engine!...stupid me)....anywho, so 2 to 3
minutes elapse and a trucker guy pulls over and brings a brand new fire
estinguisher with him....he tries to douse the engine with the
estinguisher..but no luck....empties the whole thing and the fire still
continues......blargh! This is when i decided calling 911 would
probably be the next best thing to do on the list of Things to Do When
Your Car Catches on Fire. So, i call and the lady tells me to remain
calm.........remain calm i say?!?! Remain calm?!?! How dare she! She's
not watching the 2nd love of her life burn to death while standing
there watching helplessly. Did she not know that this car was more then
a car to me....it was the 2nd love of my life, Betty. Did she not
realize that this car has been with me through the ups...the downs and
the in betweens? How many girlfriends this car has driven me to go
see....how many nights of parties this car has taken me to....the
places i've seen, the people that have passed out in the car.....oh
lord, the memories...all flooding back to me right then and there while
all i hear is "hello...sir? are u there, we've dispatched fire team to
your location.....blah blah blah"....that's all i could think
of.......BOOKS...and books!!! I just realized that my new textbooks for
class were still in there! CRAP! Not always the brightest crayon in the
box, I just jumped back into a car that has a hood completely covered
in fire...and for what? Books??? Well, not just books, but shoes...and
other goodies that i keep in my car...scary moment though...i was
getting my books out, my phone, camera, shoes, clothes out....and that
was no prob...but last, i went to go get my book bag and jump outta the
car..but the book bag string got caught on the parking brake...and in
that moment..i panicked! As simple as just lifting the e-brake and
picking off the string...instead i clumsly kept pulling at my bookbag
hoping it understand that i was in fear of blowing up to bits and
pieces...i had just pictured the fire reaching to the gas tank, or
exploding through the glass and me just stuck in
there....baaam....kabloooey! but luckily.....i snapped into it and
jumped out with my bookbag......but R.I.P to my graphic calculators and
my $300 PDA, i'll miss you! So, ya, fire trucks came around 15 minutes
a lil too late. By then, the entire interior had already been a firey
mess and a few explosions of the tires here and there and the
shattering of glasses......they had miss an opportunity to save my
Betty and become a hero......
So you're probably
wondering what i'm doing now without a car? Nah, i got a car...you
would think that I would get a new car right? Nope...my sister gets a
new car....my YOUNGER sister! A brand spanking new car...a sports coupe
none the less.....and me, i get her car...and what is it??? it's the
exact same i car i used to have, except a year newer.....ya good
thinking...i was traumatized by this car blowing up ...so let's give
him the exact same model......apparently they've missed out on Good
Parenting 101...it's ok, i can't complain, this car is great, gets me
around without any probs....and it's alot nicer....props to me little
sister for keeping it in good condition!
Wow, that was
a hell of an update..if you read all that and still continue to
here...you deserve a pat on the back....and in intermission...so go
pee...grab a cupcake or two, take a nap....i'll wait.
Back yet? Ok good, cuz i got tired of waiting for you......same thing i told your mother (doesn't make any sense, but whatev)
Ok
, on to update #4, you ready? This one's a big one too...here it
goes.......i FINALLY graduated from college! Thank you, thank you,
thank you xanga, you've been with me every day of the journey...except
when i stopped checking on xanga, then you missed out on a year or so,
but hey, what's a few years between friends huh? Anywho, it was
great.....finally a college graduate and joining the alumni
network....."so what's next Mystry?" Oh i dunno....i guess i'll do what
every other college graduate does.........nothing. I'll just sit around
drinking margaritas in my underwear and watch the food network....isn't
that what having a degree gives you the right to do? Well i'm doing it!
I graduated!!! Actually, to be on the real real with you folks....i'm
actually looking to becoming an adult....this transcends into my next
update.....
Update #5: My bestfriend in the whole wide
world (someone who i'd probably go gay for if it was legal here)...just
moved outta the country......well not really, but it feels like
that.....he moved to NEW YORK!!! WTF...i mean, seriously, out of all
places. We were supposed to live in florida forever...and have
babies.....i mean, not together, but seperately, with seperate women
that is....anywho, you know the deal. Anywho, he moved a few days
back....and i'm not feeling the same no mo. Here i am, the verge of 26
(yes, now u know)...college graduate, single (not yet ready to mingle,
but accepting offers if you're applying), and clueless as to do with
the next move in my life.....well that is until my bestfriend gave me
the push i needed....so here i am again....26, single....and now,
possibly thinking of relocating my entire life to NYC! the Big Apple!
...but first, i just gotta make sure he can survive up there on his
own.....that'll give me a little more reassurance before i just uproot
my entire life......so if you're reading this...and you're not broke
and/or dead.....call me, i'll move up there soon....miss ya
boo...err...i mean buddy.
Well there you have
it....some of the biggest things that have happened to me in the past
year! Like a faithful german shepard, you were right there to listen to
me. Even though probably only 1 or 2 of you will make it through this
entire novel of an update...it's nice to know that you listened.....i
mean, i don't care...but it's nice...it warms my body...like warm
chocolate...or warm pineapple juice...or someone who's warm who pees on
you during a snowfight which wasn't even started by you, but he was all
like "snow fight!" and you can't say no...so then you start
fighting...and you've got your mound of snowballs and you're building
up your fortress..and you're backs turned to those bullying punks...and
when you least expected it..you're hit with a warm gushing of yellow
water....warm yellow water, with a distinct smell of pee....because it
is............................i digress...that didn't happen to me, i'm
just saying, that's how you guys warm me up 
anywho u
xanga whore(s), enjoy your life, the things you have, and the people
you do....cuz u never know when you're car will blow up, your face will
need stitches, or your bestfriend leaves away leaving you helpless and
alone.....enjoy it suckers!!!! and don't forget....Keep On Trucking!
Yours Returningly,
Me | | |
| Well helllooo fellow xangians! While i realize that the luster of Xanga from my days of blogging is no longer, i still feel the need to write just because it's a hobby and because i realize that many of you are starving for a mystryman update! Alas, hunger no more, for your bellies will be filled with bountiful updates!!!! **Updates Galore, Help Yourselves to seconds** Well, it's been well over a year since my last update, so where do i begin!??! (insert joke "from the beginning,..rimshot). Well, it is mother's day weekend, so the latest update....i still love my mother! How's that for an update? No? ok, well let's move on, shall we? Ok, so, since March of 2007, what has happened? Well i'll tell you a few of the major events of my life, starting in chronological order.... 1) went through a series of unsuccessful relationships that only proved my theory that women are evil....then i met future wife.......then future wife because present ex-girlfriend, still prooving that women are evil. ( if present ex-girlfriend is reading this....i'm only joking, you were never evil....just a soul sucking leech!!!! ...i kid about that part too...sort of) ....well folks...i would write more...but i'm leaving work early today! it's saturday, the day is beautiful and i live in Florida.......off to the beach i go! don't worry, i'll be back tomorrow to fill ya in on the rest...sorry to leave ya hanging, but the rest is Juicy!!! Love you all, and i've missed you all so much! | | |
| it's 6:38am on a thursday morning and I can't sleep, plus I have a frightening suspicion that I left the oven on....but I'm too lazy to go check.... so here I am, laying in bed writing a new and boring entry on my sidekick III © (which I love!)
I have the worst sleeping habits! Just the other night, I came home dreadfully tired after another unproductive day at work, and I thought " alright, i'll for sure go to sleep right away!" Nope! I was dead wrong....facebook is the enemy of sleep and productivity.... I think I killed 2 hours just writing comments, looking at pics and whatnot.... then I thought..."yipeee, I'm for sure tired....I'll go to sleep now!" Nope, once again. I tried, but not knowing what happened to Meredith since last week's episode was killing me inside.....so of course, I get out of bed at 5am, log on to ABC.com and watched this week's episode of Grey's Anatomy (which, btw, kicks so much ass, and if you say it doesn't, I'll stab you later). It was a great episode! I won't ruin it for ya.... but get your box of tissues ready, its a tear jerker! Not that I cried or anything!
This weekend is South Beach Bhangra! I'm excited, its my first time (and probaly last time) going. I'm not exactly sure what's going on down there in Miami, but I'm sure it involves the beach and Bhangra. I love Bhangra music....I have no idea what they're saying, but it rules so much.... I don't care what I'm doing.... if I heard bhangra music playing, I'd jump up and scream "BALLE BALLE!!!" Just imagine if they played bhangra music in church.... Oh Snap!!!! Holy Ghost party yall! Brrrrraaaah!!!!
I had the biggest urge to go skinny dipping the other day.... but I don't get why its called skinny dipping, why not naked dipping? I have a theory though.... I bet the first person to think of the name was probaly a hot chick...and she's like "hey, this is awesome....but it would suck if fat people did this....." Hence, the name SKINNY, I guess its to ward off fat people from removing articles of clothing and cannonballing into a pool..... gooood thinking Skinny Hot Chick!
I wanna be remembered for something...it doesn't have to be something good either, I'm OK with just being remembered. Maybe I'll cover myself in red kool-aid and streak naked through campus yelling "Oh Yeahhhh!" 10 years from now, people will be like...."hey dude, you remember that lil indian dude that ran around covered in kool-aid screaming "Oh Yeahhh".....ya I remember him.....Hey, I remember him too......cool" Now that would be awesome as hell !!!
It's amost 7am and I still can't sleep!
I'm super excited! I found out they are making a movie after my all-time favorite childhood cartoon... Transformers! Robots in friggin disguise!!! I can't believe it! It doesn't come out til July, but its definately worth the wait! I used to have dreams about being a transformer! Optimus Prime is my hero.... I remember giving a speech about him in 4th grade! We had to talk about who our heros were.....a lot of people said their mom or dad, some said Gandhi, one kid even said Jesus, sure all those are great, but could any of them transform from a big rig truck to a robot? The answer is No! I stood up there and told them that if any of their heros fought my Hero..... Optimus would totally win, well except for Jesus, that'd be a tie or something, cuz u know, he's got that "Son of God" title and stuff, but it'd be a good fight I think.
Speaking of Jesus...I'm going to a Hindu wedding in a few weeks! I can't wait. One of my really close friends is getting married...and she's my age! That kinda makes me wonder......what do I wear???? Jk, but seriously, it does make me think....I'm 24, turning 25, when I planned out my life at 18, I thought I'd be married and settled down by now, but nope, didn't turn out that way.....life pulls a fast one on ya! Here I am, getting older by the day, and I'm still in college (long story), I hate my job, and I'm single (by choice....don't get it twisted, ladies). I still have no idea what I'm gonna do with my life....I guess I'm just very spontaneous! I believe in that a lot now. I just do what comes, never thought out or planned. I'm not one for the planning business.....I guess that's why I didn't get that wedding planner job....damn You J.Lo! I'd like to start planning things...1st of all, I plan on getting the hell out of college......ok I'm done planning, that's as far as I wanna go.
Is alcaholism really a disease? If so, then why can't I use any of my sick days on hangovers?
I think writing is a good way to relieve stress. People also say working out is another good way to relieve stress, but I got something better.... do nothing. I mean, you can't be stressed if you got nothing to do that can cause stress, rigth?? If I'm stressed, I just strip down to my boxers, jump in bed and do nothing.....I'm doing that right now...absolutely nothing, well except for writing too, but that doesn't count. So next time you're stresed about a big exam, meeting with the boss, or a project due.... get in your underwear......and do nothing! If it works, you can thank me later.
I have a bet going on with a friend of mine.... we have 90 days to get in shape, and at the end of it, we have to see who's in better shape. I'm kinda excited, but also not, cuz I'm really lazy, but the consequences of losing far outweigh my laziness. I'm hoping this really motivates me to live healthier. I think I'm gonna do one of those photo journals of my weekly progress (no, you can't see it!). Maybe if I see myself getting sexier, I'll just keep going! Great idea! I'm a genius! If you have any good workout plans, hook me up!!!! In 90 days, I'll pay you, but not in cash.....wink wink.....I'm not sure exactly what those winks were for.....sorry
Well its like 7:33am and I'm back at home at my padres casa and mi madre is up making breakfast.... so much for sleep, so I'm gonna go stuff my belly! Adios friends! Get some sleep!
Yours Awakingly,
Me
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| I am sick....sicker then most sick people....and yet, i still woke up to take my test today.....am i a trooper or what? I'm even at work...i should've called in, but i need the moneyyyyy! I spent it all this past weekend, but for good reasons though, well worth it! I'm bout to leave work...and i needed a few minutes to kill......X---> "minutes"....that's me, killing minutes! haha, ok i didn't get it either, but anywho. Anyone have any good home reciepes for colds/coughs? Something other then "go see the doctor". I'm kinda scared of doctors, dentists, police, police, janitors, and the occasional clowns. Those people scare me. My neck hurts too....good thing i'm not a giraffe....damn that would suck! I got new Timberland boots! Well, i can't say new Timbs, becuz i never had old ones, so i should just say I got Timbs! I love'em! They make me feel so damn gangsta....but not the homo-thug kinda gangsta....but the "look at me wrong and i'll kill you with my feet" kinda gangsta. They are kinda heavy though, but that's ok, i think my legs are getting a good workout everytime i take a step. They were on sale too, so it's like i HAD to get them! It was a special moment when i got it...i held them for a moment....and i cried a lil bit...i wanted to take a picture, but then that'd just be gay...and i'm not gay You know what i hate? Stupid pictures on facebook! I love killing time (X--->time, haha), and Facebook is one of the best ways for me to kill time at work. I'm always clickin away tryna find new comments, or new friend requests, or checking up on other people's walls (yes, a bit stalkerish, i know, screw you anyways!). One thing i love is checking on the new albums. They rock.....until i see the pictures in the albums. See, with me, i'll take like 150 pictures, but i know not all those pictures are facebook album worthy. No one wants to see a blurry picture, or a picture that's too damn dark, or a picture of the back of someone's head. See, that's why i'm special. I'll stay up til 5am making sure i pick out the best pictures for my facebook peoples......but see what really irks me is when someone is tooooo damn lazy to go and pick out the right pictures to put on facebook album. Instead, they post up an album with 60 pictures.....but 45 of them are too dark, too blurry, too stupid, or too sideways! WTF is that all about?!?! How can i leave wonderful comments on crap like that? I don't....well i do, but i say that i hate them...and they should die a thousand horrible deaths for posting up crap pictures! Take a look at my pictures...i dare ya......they're all perfect....unlike some people's....won't mention who! If you're reading this...and going "i wonder if he's talking about me??" Then i probaly am! Do the world a favor and jump off a bridge! Save us from 100 more albums of blurry, out of focus, pointless and ridiculous pictures! The world doesn't need anymore of that.....losers! Ok i'm done venting and it's time for me to go home. Adios you ugly people....except some of you.......Asta Menyana (that's Spanish for See ya tomorrow!!!) Yours Bilingually, Me | | |
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